Thursday, February 28, 2019
Monday, February 11, 2019
Stop, Worrying About What Others Think About You! LET IT GO
By Cindy Pitts Gilbert published, February 11, 2019
Dear Sister Knowitall,
You know that quote,
“What other people think of me is none of my business.” What does that really mean. I worry all the time what other people think
of me? I wish I could just be sure that
other people aren’t talking about me behind my back. Sincerely, Gossiped Girl
Dear Gossiped Girl,
Such a great quote isn’t it? “What other people think of me is none of my
business.” So here is what it means to me. We all want people to like us and when they
don’t for whatever reason, we get our feelings hurt. Why is it that we want to know something that
will definitely hurt our feelings. It
is human nature to be liked. We all want to be liked. The bottom line is that personalities clash
for one reason or another and no matter how hard we try sometimes we don’t like
people and sometimes they don’t like us. So, why is it so important to find out WHY
they don’t like us. If you look at it
honestly, when you aren’t fond of a personality you avoid them and do everything
you can to not come right out and say look, I don’t like you and don’t want to
be around you. We all want to avoid out
right hurting someone’s feelings even when we really don’t like them.
I am not talking about those who we know we hurt or have
hurt us. There are certain people who
have hurt you or whom you have hurt, for those folks you get it why the relationship may be damaged beyond repair. You or they have crossed a line of some kind and the relationship is damaged or in some cases
broken beyond repair. It may be that you
have been betrayed or done something to betray another. Sometimes it is a
misunderstanding, sometimes on both parts or just one party misunderstands.
Yet, the fact still remains that we all want to be liked and
when you aren’t you think you want to know why.
The truth of the matter is that you don’t really want to know. Your ego does. Your ego is the part of your personality that
wants everyone to like us. It is the child inside that wants what it wants.
It is our heart that doesn’t want to know and our brain that over analyzes the
situation trying to make both the ego and the heart happy. Honestly, our hearts truly don’t want to know and it
is really not healthy for us to know. Often times, people are just not suited for each other, it is a rejection
that we really just don’t need to know
about. So, when you think you want to know why someone doesn't like you just change your mindset and say, "What other people
think of me is none of my business." Tell
your ego to let it go. Tell your brain to
inform your ego not to try to find out
and to give your heart a break, keep it sound and completely oblivious to other
people’s opinions of you. You will be able to access so much more success for yourself if you stop worrying all the time what everyone thinks.
You have to know what is in your own heart at the end of the
day. It is you that has to live with yourself and your choices. If you are truly trying to be a better person
everyday then let go of other people’s opinions. If you are completely oblivious to what you
are doing to alienate people and you find yourself in a lonely place with no
one to talk to, then perhaps it is time to do some major self reflection and
maybe do some super detective work to find out what you are doing that rubs
the majority the wrong way. If you have a
great support group of friends and they love you just as you are, then truly
learn to let go of the need to be loved by the masses. It really is okay if you don’t click with some
folks and they don’t click with you.
Beating yourself up about it is not going to make them love you, neither
is trying to convince them how wonderful you truly are. They are the ones missing out on all your
greatness.
There is another side of the coin too. What happens when
your heart and not your ego are the reason you think you have to know. In that case reach out. Ask what you might have done to offend or
hurt someone. Go directly to the party you think is feeling wronged by
you. If you get no resolution. You know
that when all is said… or not said and done that you have tried to rectify the
situation and the other person is not willing or ready to open up. In that case, again let it go and move
on. It really isn’t any of your business
if you unintentionally hurt someone and they can’t come to you to give you a
chance to rectify the situation. You
have to again self reflect and if you are truly unaware of what it was and they
don’t want to share. You have to let it
go or it will eat away at you. Forgive yourself if they can't forgive you or be forgiven. You have
a right to be happy and are not responsible for anyone else’s reaction to what
you did if it was unintentional especially if you aren't even aware.
I’m not saying be oblivious to your own actions and how they affect
others. That is the last thing I am
saying. I am just reminding you that you can only control your actions and your
reactions not others. Dwelling on a
situation you cannot change is insanity.
Attempting to make amends can only go so far, if the other party is
unwilling to acknowledge you or your attempt to fix the situation. Everyone is doing the best they can with the
circumstances they have been given. It
may not meet your standards but it is a
fact nonetheless. Forgive yourself and
do what you can to always be kind.
Hugs
Sister Knowitall 😤
Hugs
Sister Knowitall 😤
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